blog

We are all guilty of it. It could be as simple as letting that load of laundry grow bigger before we toss it into the washing machine. Or it might be letting the dishes wait until morning when you aren’t quite so tired.

Or…it might be putting off that task on your to-do list at work. You know the one. You have been avoiding it for a few hours, or maybe until the next day…or even next week, if you don’t want it to give you a poor start to your weekend. 

But I’m going to let you in on a little secret…

It won’t go away.

No matter how much we wish the procrastination fiery would come and do our laundry, our dishes, or that hated task at work…she is a busy little fiery. She is not as magical as Santa visiting every house in one evening. 

Tip #1 Know your triggers. 

What does your behavior look like when you are procrastinating? Do you put that folder at the bottom of your inbox? Or do you look the other way when that frustrating email glares at you? Recognizing your patterns is the first step in changing your procrastination ways.

Tip # Why do you procrastinate? 

Studies have shown that people procrastinate because they are delaying or are against doing the task, aren’t organized, lack motivation, or are impulsive. This results in putting off one task in preference to another (yes, of course, there are times when something lands on your desk that is a legitimate “must do now” task). Sometimes we feel the task is too big, and we become overwhelmed or fear failing to do the task well.

Tip #3 You can change!

Know that just because you have procrastinated doesn’t mean you have to keep procrastinating. Forgive yourself and move forward, knowing that you are intentionally trying to leave your procrastinating ways behind. Simply acknowledge that fact and let it go. Not acknowledging it will set you up for failure in the future. 

Tip #4 Procrastination is an evil beast.

Try making a commitment to yourself that you will get this task done by such & such a date. Then just do it. Make it happen. Don’t get distracted or discouraged. Don’t let stress creep into your mind, and don’t stop. Take one bite at a time out of that beast of a project. (You might need to take a step back, gain some perspective, or if you are like me…a change of scenery adds some fresh ideas and gets your cognitive juices flowing again!). 

Tip #4 Find a goal buddy. 

A co-worker, a friend, your significant other…it doesn’t matter. Talk to one another about your goals for the day. Make yourself accountable to someone. Then celebrate your successes together! Make your to-do list have a fun ending you will look forward to!

Tip #5 Slap your inner voice. 

When you find yourself hearing inner thoughts of “I can’t do this,” “I wish this didn’t land on my desk,” “I don’t have enough time or information to complete this”, etc., simply shove those inner thoughts aside. Your inner voice can be a negative force, and will do her best to try to talk you out of completing your to-do list. (Mine likes to talk me into believing something sugary will help me focus. Beware of this - it’s simply NOT true.)

A few final words: Your most hated tasks that cause procrastination are not a catastrophe. They aren’t out to get you. Don’t stress over perfection. Put your best into it, then don’t criticize yourself because you didn’t have enough time to make it perfect. You do have enough time, don’t let this be a distraction. Set your to-do lists realistically. None of us can do everything. Delegate, take small chunks, set small goals and know your peak efficiency times - and use them for good!

As women we have had to face challenges that our male counterparts don’t. Society has one view of a woman’s role, men have a view, and of course, we have our own view of what we want our roles to look like. No matter what role we are in, there are barriers to accomplishing our dreams. 

Of the top barriers women face in the workplace is sexism. Many have fought having women in high-level leadership roles because we are women. We are the recipients of harassment, interruptions, or being mistook for lower level workers. Stereotyping of a group, a gender, a race all leads to low expectations. When women have assertive traits at work we are seen as pushy, aggressive, or some wonder if it’s that time of the month for us. We may face backlash or be deemed less competitive if we don’t fit into a set behavior pattern. 

Women also have more family responsibilities than many men. Balancing work and family is a struggle. Household responsibilities tend to fall on the woman, such as laundry, cleaning the house, cooking, shopping, caring for the children, and of course caring for the sick family members. 

So what can we do to remove barriers?

Having a well developed leadership network is a great way to begin lowering those barriers. Sharing concerns and challenges with other women in your shoes gives you a sounding board, reinforcement, and camaraderie in our professions. Small gatherings over wine or more formal meetings are both good ways to learn from each other. Having a strong network will help you personally and professionally.

Look for programs in your industry, or on a topic important to your career. Building your community of support will offer both you and your contacts a place to work through barriers together. Finding inspiration in one another, showing empathy for challenges, and adopting tried and true leadership traits will enhance your value to your support network and by extension to your employer. 

Remember, a great way to be involved is to be a mentor or seek a mentor. Having this dynamic relationship can remind the mentor of the struggles they faced and how they overcame them. That knowledge can help the mentee learn from your experience. Mentoring empowers professional women to grow, excel, and gain the visibility needed to advance in their careers. 

Tap Into Leadership Programs and Positions

The more you put yourself out there and take on challenges the better equipped you will be for the next barrier to advancing your career. Have a goal in mind for your career advancement. Opportunities don’t just fall in your lap. Plan, strategize, and communicate your career advancement goals to your supervisor. Set your sights on short and long term career goals. Know your strengths and make a plan to develop those strengths further. Know your weaknesses and how to overcome them. Finally, when you set your career goals, know what it will take to achieve them. Seek guidance when you can and make it happen! It might be a bumpy road, but you are the only one that can truly stop you.

Cherina Johnson is our guest blogger.

Have you ever put off doing something for a day that ended up being for weeks, months, or even years? How about avoiding to do something because it brings up painful memories, is boring, or the task seems overwhelming? If so, well let’s talk about procrastination.

Procrastination “is the act of unnecessarily postponing decisions or actions.” Merriam-Webster defines procrastination as “to put off intentionally and habitually; to put off doing something that should be done.” When something is intentional, it means it was done on purpose. On the other hand, when something is habitual it means it is a lifestyle. When procrastination gets to this point, it is hard to break. Not impossible to break, but will be a challenge to overcome. Let me repeat it again, not impossible to break, but rest assure you are likely going to have a fight on your hands in doing so. Depending on how long the procrastination has gone on will determine the strength of the stronghold it has in your life.

In order to correct procrastination in your life, you have to first be honest with yourself and acknowledge you have a problem. Well, I make myself vulnerable and share openly that I have a problem. The two areas I would like to share about is not keeping my purse cleaned out, and allowing paperwork to pile up on me to the point of clutter. Now, I carry a purse practically every day. Starting off, I already have a lot of stuff in it; however, when I throw in receipts, paper towels, candy wrappers, check stubs, etc. over time it ends up looking a hot mess inside. Recently, my every day purse was so heavy that my husband even agreed with me that I needed to clean it out. So I made up my mind and put forth the action to lighten the load. In my private time being home alone, I poured the majority of the contents of my purse on the floor and started to separate the items into different piles; keep, shred, and recycle. It was an embarrassment to see all that “stuff” that was in my purse, and that I had allowed it once again to get to that point. Whether personally or professionally, we all need to clean out some areas in our lives so that we can grow and be more productive. The second thing is allowing paperwork to pile up on me to the point of clutter. Junk mail sits on the kitchen counter that should immediately be placed in the recyclables and legitimate mail stays unopened longer than it should, which should be promptly addressed then properly filed. What kind of things are piling up in your life?

According to (Shatz, n.d.), the following are some dangers of procrastination:

•  Academic issues
•  Employment and financial issues
•  Interpersonal relationship issues
•  Reduced wellbeing
•  Worse mental and physical health.

However, (Chua, 2022) suggests ways to break the cycle of procrastination by doing these things:

•  Break your work into little steps
•  Change your environment
•  Stop over-complicating things

If you have a problem with procrastinating in your personal or professional life I hope you were inspired “to do” something about it. Join me and make a personal declaration to stop procrastination, taking one step at a time.

Chua, C. (2022, September 26). How to stop procrastination: 14 practical ways for procrastinators. Lifehack. https://www.lifehack.org/articles/featured/11-practical-ways-to-stop-procrastination.html.

Procrastination. Merriam-Webster. www.https:// https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/procrastinate#:~:text=%3A%20to%20put%20off%20intentionally%20and,something%20that%20should%20be%20done.

Shatz, I.  Procrastination dangers: the negative effects of procrastination. Solving Procrastination. https://solvingprocrastination.com/procrastination-dangers/.

  Cherina Johnson is our guest blogger.

      The topic of discussion for September’s Women in Leadership luncheon was “Seasons of Change and Transformation” with guest speaker, L’Oreal Hartwell.   The author, entrepreneur, and business woman shared valuable life lessons from personal experiences and family situations that have shaped her into the awesome woman she is today; which also include being a beloved wife, mother, and sister.  However, her transparency in sharing her story was magnetic.  It drew you in to want to hear more and more of what she had to say.  The positive outlook on life, despite the many obstacles she and her family had to overcome to reach the level of success that they enjoy now is admirable.  The sincerity from her heart to want to see others succeed in life, and her willingness to make herself available to assist in whatever way she can to help make it happen, even giving complete strangers her personal phone number to reach out to her to connect later, so that she can see how to help to make their dream a reality.  I was really impressed with our guest speaker in action up close and from afar in her interactions with others as well as myself.  She was down to earth and personable.

                There were so many things that resonated with me during L’Oreal’s presentation that caused me to have an inward excitement.  For example, her positive outlook on life was one of my favorites.  Positivity attracts positivity!  I was leaping inside with excitement, and different Bible verses were coming to mind as she spoke.  Such as, “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also” (James 2:26) and “Therefore I say to you whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them” (Mark 11:24).  However, she was not just a positive voice, but shared practical things that she put into action to improve her quality of life for she and her family.  For instance, from academic probation to MBA graduate and from her and her family temporarily living with her grandmother to having a home in the neighborhood she envisioned living in.          Even though she shared with the group how nervous she was to speak at the Women in Leadership luncheon it was not obvious for she gave an awesome presentation that was shared from her heart that was practical and sincere.  As a result, you could see and feel her positive energy, choosing to look at things from a positive perspective despite what she has gone through in life.  Being a person of resilience, bouncing back from obstacles, disappointments, setbacks, and lack into a beautiful person of gratitude for the blessed life that she now enjoys with a desire to help others to enjoy a blessed life as well; through living their God-given dreams and accomplishing their goals.

Some of my takeaways were the following:

• ·         “Breakdown and breakthrough happen at the same time”
• ·         “Everything is based on perception”
• ·         “I do not lose I learn.”

                On behalf of Women in Leadership Great Lakes Bay, thank you, L’Oreal Hartwell for sharing your story with us.  We were inspired, challenged, and blessed by your presence!

Think back to a time when you had someone who was a confidant, a role model, a person that led the way for you, and helped you in some way…

Wasn’t it a nice feeling knowing you had someone you could count on to help you navigate life’s moments? You had a mentor! 

Many of us have had someone who was a mentor at one time or another. An older sibling, your mother, your father, a teacher, your first boss. The opportunities are endless to form that mentor/mentee relationship. 

What does it take to be a GREAT mentor?

Not every one wants to be a mentor. So the first step is to have the desire to mentor someone. A mentor should be eager to teach and willing to invest time and energy into another person. There should also be a connection between the mentor and mentee. The dynamic is very important because a mentor also needs to provide honest and direct feedback. A trusting relationship must be built so the mentee understands the feedback is for their benefit and not seen as negative. 

Top qualities of a good mentor are

• Enthusiasm

• Connection

• Value learning

• Encouragement

• Active listening

• Provide feedback

• Respect

• Experts

To be a mentor, you need to have extensive knowledge and experience in your field, having learned from practice and applied principles yourself. This way you can honestly say you know from experience when you offer feedback and instruction. Knowing people and the ability to teach at different levels helps. If you don’t understand what your mentee needs from you, there is a gap in the process. Your job is to help them grow!

Mentors are an integral part of many organizations. You will increase your mentee’s confidence level, reassuring them that they are doing a good job, and encourage them in their thought process, getting out of their comfort zone, and taking initiatives. As a mentor you will be passing down your wisdom and giving them a framework for handling situations. The mentee will still plan their career path, and the mentor helps them achieve their goals with coaching, and what they need help with. 

Ideally the dynamic will be mutual.

Sharing your thoughts and desires for the mentor/mentee will create a mutually dynamic relationship. It should not be a one sided thing. It takes effective communication, constructive criticism, and no judgement on either side. Clear communication, trust, and respect are key elements of a making this relationship effective.

Your mentee will learn just as much from their mistakes as they do their successes.

Don’t focus on the negatives. Neither party will be perfect, and shouldn’t be judged. While pointing out mistakes or ways something could be improved is needed, highlighting the positive is a win too! Empathy is important so your mentee knows you can relate to them and understand their feelings. 

Note that not everyone works and learns at the same pace. Your mentee might be quick to pick up some things, yet have more challenges with other tasks. Work with the strengths your mentee has and nourish the areas that need more guidance. 

If you are looking for a mentee or a mentor, don’t be shy. Reach out and ask someone!

As women sometimes we have to dance around issues or avoid certain topics. But why should we? Each of us has valid opinions and knowledge to share. It’s ok if we disagree, but it’s not ok to hide our true thoughts and feelings to avoid a nasty conversation.

Keeping in mind that there is no wrong or right here. But here are some ideas to think about when hosting a power talk.

Age can be a plus! 

Multi-generational discussions can offer differing perspectives on your chosen topic. What is true or the norm in today’s world views isn’t going to be the same as it was 10 or 20 years ago. More experienced women can offer things a younger generation has not considered, and vice versa.

Include women you DON’T know…

Part of what makes power talks exciting is hearing opinions from people you just met. Step out of your comfort zone of trusted friends and hear it from someone new to your circle. Set some ground rules or no-judgement policies so nobody takes the discussion too negatively. Keep it engaging and thought provoking, but a safe zone where everyone feels validated.

What about men?

There will be some topics best kept between your girls, but how about including some men from time to time? They can be a great ally. Women still face inequalities in the workplace. Why not have a power talk with some men who see women as valuable individuals that have a different perspective than they do. Learn from each other, find ways to use your differences to benefit your profession.

Life experiences can add a lot!

There are definitely some things many of us experience, such as childbirth, family vacations, and challenges in the workplace. Even though we share the experiences, the process adds something unique to our lives. One person’s take can give some food for thought to another.

Size does matter.

Your best discussions will happen when your group is kept small enough to feel intimate and comfortable. Having too large a group can be intimidating for people to speak freely. Maybe have some snacks and beverages to help lighten the conversation and keep it friendly!

Informal is empowering.

Who doesn’t like a bonfire? Or an evening at home? Keeping the location informal gives you control over the environment. You won’t have to worry about a loud restaurant, nosy neighboring tables, or a feeling of distaste about a topic or comment. A cozy atmosphere at home is a better option for your guests to really open up about their thoughts and feelings. 

Are you ready?

Whether you create a formal invitation, an email invite, or a social media message is up to you. To be more effective, you can have some topics and questions written down before your guests arrive. You can even include this in your invitation! 

What are you waiting for? Invite some peeps and get talking!

Sandra Crosby Robinson is our guest blogger.

It is key to visualize what you desire and to always keep the vision with you as you grow and change.

Imagine this, You are at dinner at one of your favorite restaurants and have decided to enjoy your meal without guilt, just pleasure. The ambience is beautiful, service is excellent. After waiting and anticipating, here comes your meal. As your server is bringing your meal to the table, you notice that it resembles the picture in the menu. Not only is it what you asked for, it is also what you desire! Your mouth begins to water, there is a twinkle in your eye, and your heart skips a beat. You subconsciously place your dinner conversation on pause while you reach for your silverware. You recognize that you are about to have a sumptuous meal and wonderful dining experience. Suddenly, before you can taste your feast and enjoy the moment: you began to count calories, your eyes wander to the plate next to you, and you question if you should have ordered the same meal as someone else. Finally, you calculate the price of the meal in your head— in lightning speed, what was a joyful treat, has now become a mediocre or unappetizing meal that you no longer desire to eat; you are unable to enjoy and have a sumptuous dining experience. Translation: you just lost your appetite (desire, liking, fondness, taste, willingness, hunger, zest, gusto, thirst, and inclination)! Why? What happened?

Just a thought: The meal did not change once it was placed on the table; nor did the meal of your guest change. What changed was your Appetite: Your desire to dive-in while allowing your imagination and reality to meet. We are all endowed with an Appetite for several things, not just food. Our Appetite fuels us and is a key deciding factor in how we approach our life.
Have distractions, disappointments, questions, guilt and/or fear interfered with your goals? Do you want to regain your hunger? Try this, go back to the original picture; your original “why?”. As your server (appetite) is bringing your meal (hopes, dreams, goals, desires) to you, choose to notice that it resembles the picture (imagination) in the menu (potential). Not only is it what you asked for, it is also what you desire. Choose to get that twinkle in your eye, allow your mouth to water, and allow your heart to skip a beat. 

Place your dinner conversation on pause while you subconsciously reach for your silverware. Recognize that you are about to have a sumptuous meal (live life). Take your first bite, immediately close your eyes as you savor the first bite, and smile with satisfaction. Take delight in the meal while looking forward to the next time. Now recognize it is worth the cost and so are you!

Tantalize your taste buds. Live life. Remember, do not give up! 

 

“Stay focused, ignore the distractions, and you will accomplish your goals much faster.”

— Joel Osteen

 

Sandra Crosby Robinson

Just Pen It

By nature women are ingrained to be nurturers, cheerleaders to their spouse and children, short order cooks, chauffeurs, nurses, and all the other things we do for others every day. We are used to multi-tasking and caring for others. It makes perfect sense that these traits will carry over as we enter leadership roles on the job.

What traits do women bring to the table?

One can argue that women approach leadership differently. But that’s not the whole picture. It’s more about the purpose we have and the contributions we make in our careers. In a study conducted by Caliper, women who held leadership positions were more likely to exhibit assertiveness, be persuasive, are more motivated to get things done, be empathetic, are more flexible and more social. That’s not to say men don’t have these traits, but women scored stronger.

Women tend to have a high level of emotional intelligence in their leadership roles. This differs from being emotional on the job. Emotional intelligence refers to considering others’ feelings, keeping commitments, and offering praise and learning opportunities for others. Women leaders also tend to like more autonomy, and thrive on a flexible schedule of work formats such as in-office and remote work combinations.

What about ambitions?

It seems ambition is directly related to company culture and diversity. Less diverse companies tend to have less ambitious women, creating a gap in ambitions by gender. These companies will have more men in upper management positions. However, when there is greater diversity and a solid company culture, women are just as likely to move into those upper management positions. 

Home and family commitments do not necessarily affect professional ambitions of women. They can be just as driven as men and have a family. It might take a little planning, but aren’t we all great multi-taskers?

Wouldn’t we all like to think of ourselves as great leaders? That’s partially true. Where we fall short is in thinking we have it all figured out. 

Tip #1: Nobody has it all figured out. 

It doesn’t matter what your business is, it is constantly changing.Change is good. But we have to evolve with the changes. We have to stay on our toes. We have to be smart, efficient, and experts in our field. But keep it real. We don’t know it all, and we never will. So accept the fact that it will never be figured out. 

Tip #2: Be self-aware.

Know your limitations, flaws, and weaknesses. Knowing this will undoubtedly make you a better leader. Lean on those on your team that have strengths that make up for your limits. This will also make it easier to set realistic goals and give you reason to be prepared. 

Tip #3: Know how to motivate!

Leading isn’t just about providing direction. Your staff needs you to help motivate them. One way to do this is to transform attitudes and beliefs. This won’t happen overnight, but a gradual change in culture to promote teamwork might be the ticket to success.

Tip #4: Know who comes first.

Who comes first? No, this isn’t a chicken or egg question. It’s more simple than that. Your staff, your employees should come first. Leadership is last. People who feel valued will reciprocate by trying harder and will do it joyfully. Be empathetic by making connections. Build up the employees you lead. Help them to grow and reach their full potential.

In short, what do women bring to the leadership table? Everything! 

Read more tips here: https://hbr.org/2020/04/7-leadership-lessons-men-can-learn-from-women

Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom. - Gen. George Patton

Does anyone else notice how families don’t live just down the street from one another like they used to? Maybe it is you that moved away from your hometown, maybe your adult child has moved out of state for college or to start their own adventures. It is every parent’s dream to see their child spread their wings and watch them make their way in the world. 

Success is a journey, not a destination. - Arthur Ashe

Success is where preparation and opportunity meet. - Bobby Unser

This is an incredible compliment to your parenting skills. The journey your child takes, the way your family will branch out across the country, even to other countries shows how successful you have been in raising your child. 

Success is walking from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm. - Winston Churchill

Behind every successful man there’s a lot of unsuccessful years. - Bob Brown

Success is measured according to each person’s perspective of what success means to them. Success can be measured by wealth, level of education, status, popularity, occupation, etc. In business, you often measure success by customer satisfaction. A happy customer will return to do more business with you. On a personal level, success is measured by something different.

Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up. - Thomas Edison

That some achieve great success, is proof to all that others can achieve it as well. - Abraham Lincoln

How do you measure success in your life? As Women In Leadership roles or who want to achieve your own level of success, what do you do to make it happen? Do you work hard so you can play hard? Do you continue your education? Do you want recognition? Is your success just for you?

Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly. - Robert F. Kennedy

So what is the true measure of success? Ask yourself:

• Do you enjoy what you do?

• Do you love your life?

• Are you proud of yourself?

• Have you made an impact on others?

• Do you have people that care about you?

• Do you see progress in your life?

What would you add to our list of ways to measure your success? 

Guest Blogger, Cherina Johnson is the owner of Upstairs Resale Shop located in Saginaw, MI, which is currently operating as an online and pop-up store.

Fall is a favorite time of year for me. If you enjoy eating apples as I do, the fall season should make your taste buds burst inside by the mere thought of all the apple goodies that are in season and available this time of year; for instance, plain apples, caramel apples, homemade apple pie, apple donuts and fresh apple cider to name a few.

Fall brings about cooler temperatures that are perfect for wrapping up in a soft throw and sit in a favorite chair or recliner, to enjoy a cup of homemade chicken noodle soup or soup of your choice, or to sip a hot cup of tea. I look forward to these moments to unwind from the hustle and bustle of the day, and it a purposeful effort to get some relaxation time on a consistent basis.

Over a year ago I purchased online two greeting cards from Shannon Cohen, Inc. located in Grand Rapids, MI. I really liked both of the cards that I had selected, but one of the two cards stuck out to me. It read “THINGS FELL INTO PLACE AS SHE GOT INTO POSITION.”

Since I like giving and sending cards to others for encouragement, my intention was that I would do the same with these two cards as well. However, I have held onto both of them. I propose to you that things will not fall into place in your life or in my life, if we do not have the right attitude. Proverbs 23:7a (NKJV) states, “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” With all the negativity that our minds are bombarded with on a daily basis, especially from the news outlets, we have to watch ourselves that we do not fall into the trap of negativity. It is easier said than done, but we have the power to control what we allow to feed into our minds.

Watch what you say about yourself and the situation, as well as be attentive to what you allow others to say to you or about any given situation. Be informed but do not become a garbage container for it is toxic to the mind. It is our responsibility to keep a positive outlook in life, not matter what is going on outside of us. “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,” according to Romans 12:2a (NIV). There could be chaos going on all around us; in our lives, on our jobs, in our family, even in the world, but we do not have to allow the chaos to reside within us. Choose to keep a positive attitude, no matter what! Then watch out and see how things will fall into place because you positioned yourself from the right mental standpoint.